It’s been 365 days since the worst day of my life. It’s been 365 days since the best day, too.
It’s been 365 days since I woke up in a hospital room with my baby after hearing the word “tumor” in relation to her brain the day before. It’s been 365 days since I held her tight, not knowing what to expect.
It’s been 365 days since the nurses gave my baby a drug that made her loopy and hilarious before surgery. 365 days since we took her for a walk around the 5th floor of the hospital – the neurology floor – laughing at her shenanigans. 365 days since I handed my baby to a nurse who would carry her back to the operating room. 365 days since we didn’t know how different our lives would be when we saw E again. 365 days since we didn’t know if she would be better or worse.
It’s been 365 days since we got the call. 365 days since I heard her surgeon’s voice say he got it all. 365 days since we held each other tight, celebrating the good news.
It’s been 365 days since we waited to see her in recovery – for hours. 365 days since my heart couldn’t wait to reunite with my baby. 365 days since I visited a PICU for the first time. 365 days since I saw an incision and stitches where hair used to be. 365 days since I saw her face – swollen and shiny, unable to move or make noise. 365 days since I looked into her exhausted, medicated eyes. 365 days since I could tell she was relieved we were there.
It’s been 365 days since E got the chance to be a normal kid. 365 days since my entire perspective on life changed.
The past 365 days have been filled with worry, anxiety, tears, joy, progress, thankfulness, laughter, and a whole lot of love. Sweet E is a healthy, normal little girl. She is caught up on her motor skills, is quickly catching up on her speech, and has had 2 clear MRI’s. She has been released from her neuro-ophthalmologist to her regular ophthalmologist. She’s goofy, mischievous, so smart, and amazingly sweet.
I have never worried more in my life than I have in the past 365 days. I have never trusted God more than I have in the past 365 days. I have never been more thankful than have been in the past 365 days.